God Knows What Matters To You

 What matters to you? How does God show up in ways that matter to you?

God Knows What Matters To You

Ever since I was a little girl playing on the Jersey Shore I have loved the ocean. I have loved the views. I have loved to look out and see across the skies. When I lived in Philadelphia we had lived in a row house. As a little girl I always thought we lived in a 5 story home. In reality it was three stories. On the 3rd floor we could take the screen off and sit on the roof and look out across the houses. We were not allowed to do this but my sister's and I did. 

God knows you. He knows what matters to you. There is a deep sense of peace, refueling, restoring, thoughtful praying and thinking that happen in the spaces I have with views. And it seems every where I go, most of my life, God gives me just that, a beautiful view. There have also been  moments of blessings on what mattered to me. Things that may seem silly to another person have been earth shattering wows!!!  WOW as in God Knows What Matters To Me. 

I had a business event in 2013 which had me in the Fox Network studio. I had the perfect outfit to wear to one of my first meetings and I wanted a harvest yellow pair of sandals. I went to Nordstrom. I went to Target. I went to Fred Meyer. Nothing. I could not find those perfect shoes. I stood in Fred Meyer and asked God, "Please God, direct me to these shoes. I know it's silly but I would really like  harvest yellow sandals."  I was scheduled to get my hair done the day before I had to leave for LA. I arrived at my appointment early and wandered over to the Thrift store. And as blessings would be in my life, there before my eyes the beautiful $5.00 Harvest Yellow sandals I had been looking for. God Knows What Matters To You!!

I was having this wonderful conversation earlier this week with one of my boys. He said, "Mom it seems that God always gives you what you want."  I was absolutely tickled that in his life he was accounting the times I had prayed for things and God delivered beautiful little moments and blessings. Praying happened on the way to school every single day. Thanking God and each kid going around and thanking God and then submitting our prayer requests. I had to remind him that God knows what matters to us and He has wonderful blessings and gifts. However it's not always the case. I accounted a few significant moments that God has me waiting on answered prayers. And he said, "Oh". That was it, "Oh". Then he said, "But really mom, pretty much God answers your prayers." 

This picture above, a beautiful sunset was a gift to my heart and soul. A beautiful sunset with trees. I was thinking about some hard things and I literally looked out and saw the gift of another wonderful view.  It was truly, in my world of knowing God, that comfort and peace from above. A view that means something to me. What matters to you?  Harvest Yellow Shoes? A beautiful sunset?  Standing at the edge of the ocean?  A powder blue Nike jacket?  Yes that happened, too. 

Okay here is the Nike jacket story. I went to the Nike store to get a new ski jacket. I was living in a colder climate and already had a nice ski jacket for skiing. But I wanted a jacket for every day wear in the cold cold weather.  I went to the Nike store and found this gorgeous Tiffany Blue puffy jacket. It was $449.00. It was not that I couldn't afford it. Being a mom of 5 kids I have always had a harder time buying things for myself when my kids were ongoing with needing this and that. Ugh!!  I passed it up. I literally told my business partner about the jacket. I told him that if God wanted me to have that jacket it would come my way. I admit I was obsessing about that beautiful jacket. My partner and I were running errands for a photo shoot. We needed a few old school phones. In my crazy Elizabeth way, I looked over at him and said, "That jacket is at this Goodwill. You will see."  He laughed and was like...okay.  There in the Goodwill, in my size, with the tags still on it that jacket. He looked at me and was shocked. $20.00 of evidence that God knows what matters. 

These things that we have, come and go. The shoes are gone, the jacket still a favorite and the sunsets are coming in on a regular basis. The reality is truly, "God Knows What Matters To You."  Do we have to look for it, at times? Yes. Does life happen and one day you wake up and realize that God made provisions in ways you never expected. 

We live in a world of focus on so many negative aspects of life. Turn it all around and start focusing on those little blessings that come daily. What matters to you?  What ways do you see God blessing you. Because I do believe that, "God Knows What Matters To You."

Have a wonderful day. With Love, Elizabeth

Be still and Know That I am God in YOUR Grief

Today one of the biggest hurricanes reported is hitting Florida. Hurricane Irma is reeking devastation.  I have been following the hashtags on Twitter and Facebook. Reading the stories that we are all able to follow.  It is a storm. There will be many facing loss, grief and devastation.

Yesterday and weeks before Irma was a storm in my heart. Many of us are facing our own storms. Unrelated to rising waters. Unrelated to winds that take off a roof. Storms that affect our lives that many know nothing of.

I posted the following on Facebook yesterday.....

Sometimes in the middle of your storm...

"Be still and know that I am God."

You see my storm has nothing to do with winds, rains, and hurricanes. My storm is facing new realities in mothering. My storm is navigating the hearts of my children as we face new realities for our future. My storm is watching the enemy of deceit, lies, and division affect our family. And when the storms comes in wind, rain and hurricanes, you hunker down for the damage that is pending.

What about the storms in life that affect you and devastate you?  Storms that gave no time for hunkering down and being prepared. How is the tragedy of deceit, the tragedy of lies and the path of evil going to help any one of us hunker down and be ready? Maybe you are facing your hardest of hard. It is unexpected and you have no clue how to hunker down or even navigate it.

I cried a lot yesterday. I looked up "grief" and the stages of grief when there is a loss or tragedy in your life.  If you are close to my circle of friends and reading this, you know my story. The reality is that my story is no different than your story. The details  are not what is important. What is important is how we handle the storms of life.  How do we face the grief? How do we face new realities of everyday life? In asking these very questions of myself this past week I could only come up with this, "Be still and know that I am God."

I thought something was wrong with me because every time someone asked, "How are you doing?" I fall into a heap of tears. I thought something was wrong with me as I look back on the past years and think what I could have done differently?  And then facing family and friends and trying to muster up enough joy to show up for them. To be able to encourage them and give them hope. As the leader of my home that is important. Yet this storm is rocking my internal boat of life. 

And then these words of hope. "Be still and know that I AM God."  

It's very hard to convince anyone that God is really in the middle of our storms. Right there. We tend to think that God should step in and make everything all better. Like His might and power could toss hurricane Irma back out to see sparing Floridians of disaster. Or God could show up in a court room and cast the evils that fill the room out. And yet we watch the storms envelope us and wonder, where the heck is God in any of this.  I know I have cried out to God for months to change the trajectory of this situation. And it appears He has no answers for me and the devastation continues. And all I get from God is to simply "be still". 

There is pain and grief. There are unanswered questions. There are lots of tears.  Today is Sunday. I am home from church. I did not want to face people and answer the same questions over and over. I just wanted to be still. I wanted to sit with a friend over coffee and allow the outward process of grief. She listened, two states over. A phone call of a dear friend who knows my children, knows my heart and knows these days are hard. She asked me hard questions. She allowed me to outward process it all. 

Grief 101-1:  Do not isolate yourself and stop existing. 

I have shown up for my children. I know they are hurting and struggling. I have shown up for work. I have shown up at the dinner table. I have shown up. Even at the grocery store when the smiling checker asks me how I am doing I break down and cry. I am okay with that because I am showing up at the grocery store.  I embrace the memory of who I was before all of this. Generally happy, joy filled, and loving the little things of life. And I have to remind myself every single day that THIS is who I am. And this is a storm that will soon pass. Practice all over again that joy and that happy person.  Accept that a storm has come and God did not leave or abandon you. Because HE has shown up and prepared me long before I knew these days. (That's another blog series coming.) God shows up in people everyday. A coffee invitation later in the week. I wanted to say, "no" but I am not going to isolate myself and stop existing so I said yes. God showed up today by putting ME on the heart of a dear friend to call. God knew what I needed today. I did not want to give another breath to this storm, but grieving requires an outward process. In that outward process we learn more about ourselves, about the storms we are in and how to better navigate. Today this friend was the ears and voice of God. Using her to remind me of who I am. Using her to remind me of the mother I am and using her to pour wisdom and hope. God is a God of hope and wisdom. "Be still and know that I am God."

Grief 101-2: Read blogs and journals on grief. 

I have never experienced this kind of pain in my heart. Like actual physical pain over my chest cavity above my physical heart. My heart hurts. I really thought this cannot be normal. I though I was not handling this storm well.  I have cried tears, not been able to eat, and could not sleep. I thought of the should haves and could have's. Beating myself up. One decision in July 2016 to help a child turned into a storm I was not prepared for. All the nights awake and asking God the why and the how and then one night a blog post. A story and journey of another person's loss and grief. I thought something was wrong with me. Only to read story after story. Then to read medical journals of the stages of grief. I realized that I am actually very normal in my grief process. It felt empowering and it felt very good to know that everything I am experiencing is textbook grief in medical journals. Last night I finally slept solid. Almost 12 hours straight. Read!!!  Learn about what it means to experience grief. Face the grief. And be okay with your grief. And then .......
"Be still and know that I am God."

Grief 101-3: It's hard to let go.

There are important relationships that may have changed during this storm. There are important relationships that you had to let go of. In the middle of your storm decisions are made that you may look back on and regret. I have pleaded with myself to just let go because no one told me to not make important decisions in the middle of such a storm. And it's hard to let go. Love and caring and then changes happening all around you. Accept that it is HARD to let go. I spent the morning texting with my daughter who reminded me of the year I have had. She reminded me of the height of emotions in your hardest days and it's okay. "It will get easier mom." It's hard to think it will get easier, but it will.  And again God's heart on this, "Be still and know that I am God."  

Grief 101-4: Thank God for the people in your life.  

Today is a new day. I am giving myself permission to take one day at a time. Today is the first day in over a year I stayed behind. I did not want to show up today. The people in my life know this. It's okay.  I have people in my life who will accept today. Those same people will pull me into showing up when I can not show up on my own. I have people. Thanking God for ALL the people in my life who have walked with me in the storm and stayed the course with me when I did not know what to do. I have told my family and friends to please accept my combustible tears that come unexpectedly. It is all part of the grief process. I can be with these people any day or time and they love me, even in the storm. These people remind me who I am. Pull me into activities, play cribbage with me, invite me to their homes and allow me to cry and process this grief. They share my tears and my pain and they love my family unconditionally. God is in this. He is using YOU every single day in the way you are caring, loving, praying and allowing our family to walk through this storm. It is through the people God has surrounded me with that I truly can, "Be still and know that I am God." The truest of words EVER.

Grief 101-5: Everyone has a different storm. It's not all about you.

The hardest part about grief and storms is that you feel you are the only one in the world to experience such pains. There is loss, there are storms, there is devastation. Honestly if you met me in person. My hair and make-up may be done. My clothes clean and pressed. My shoes matching my handbag. I am that next person in line at the grocery store who appears to have it together. And it's that thought alone that reminds me that the person next to me may be experiencing really hard stuff, too. One thing I love about being with strangers is I can deflect the conversations away from me and ask questions about them. Never having to share my story again. Remember also that there are good things happening with your friends and family. Do NOT rob them of their joy. This might be a moment where you think, "Be still and know that I am God." More like, just be quiet right now and embrace where the other person is at. 

Grief 101-6: Have much GRACE for people. 

In general people mean well. People want to help you. People are concerned and care. And people will come along with the best of intentions. And in the best of intentions they will do things that make absolutely no sense at all due to the simple fact that we really do not know what we want or need in the middle of a storm. AND in a time when you are broken, grieving, and wading through the storm take joy in knowing that people love and care.  The reality is people mean well and want to help you. Tell people exactly what you need from them. I am guilty of not knowing how to do this. Yet in this storm I have learned to ask. "Be still and know that I am God." Here these words that God is the God of all of this and HE will send people to come alongside to help. 

Grief 101-7: Psalm 51:10 

 "Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me."

I am no Bible scholar but it's pretty clear that God knew there would need to be a renewal. A renew of steadfastness purity of my heart. In the many sleepless nights God met me in scripture and Word. Reminders on a daily basis. Renewing my heart daily back to HIM. Back to His promises,His hope, and His joy. Reset the internal system. Daily!!!  I know God is real. I do not have to ask or read or find Him. He has given me peace through ALL the tears, the messy and the hard. His very name is a calm in the storm.

I read the following passage on the 46th day of reading a Psalm a day. I read... 

Psalm 46:10. I wrote it in my journal and I have read it over and over. And it's the very passage that inspired this blog post.

Psalm 46:10

"He says, “Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.”

For a girl who is on the go, this passage struck me. I did not know how to pray anymore more words. My tears and broken heart were overwhelming me. I decided to just read out loud a Psalm a day. This passage took hold of my heart.  Today my 13 year old son Eric and I are reading out loud a Psalm a day. We are on chapter 5. We are doing this together after I shared how God spoke to my heart on hard stuff. Eric asked if I could do that with him. And we are doing it together.

Our storms are very hard. Grief is hard. Knowing that there is a God who can carry us through every single storm is the only way I know how to get through this. I pray today that one single person could step into the storm with confidence knowing that God is with you. Be still. Be quiet and allow God to pour into you the hope, wisdom and peace He has in this storm.

 

God's Faith Building Moment Comes From the Sky

It was a very tough week. It was late summer of 2016. It was the kind of week where you decide to grab some overnight bags, load the kids in the car and go somewhere fun. We were on summer vacation and it was time for some vacation. One thing is for sure. We LOVE roadtrips and we love being together.

Within minutes of being in the car, we were singing to Cold Play, and laughing over silly things. I was thankful that God had put on my heart to just go, without a plan. We had a destination of Seattle fun. Being with family and friends. All things my boys love doing. All things to distract us of harder things.

One morning while on this adventure we decided to drive down to the water front in Port Orchard. We then decided to take the walking Ferry to the other side and look at the big ships. It was just an easy morning to get out and play, be on the water and distract ourselves from the hard stuff left back home.

I wore one of my summer outfits with my darling shoes. The kind of shoes that are good for about two hours of walking. And based on the morning's plan that was the extent and thus I wore these darling shoes.

Once on the other side of the bay, we decided to take the bigger Ferry into downtown Seattle. Whoa I am wearing my "only walk for about two hours"shoes. Not my "walk all day" shoes. Come on!!!  Tell me I am not the only who knows her shoes well. The shoes I was wearing had produced the biggest blister months earlier after walking all over the Portland waterfront. Now heading the the Seattle waterfront I already had a blister forming. Not again.

Once on the big ferry I went to the kiosk asking if they had a band-aid. I was asking strangers if they had a band-aid. No one could find me single band-aid.  I was fearing the end of the day with these silly shoes on.

While we were on the ferry to Seattle our family was in a heavy discussion on why God does not just answer our prayers when we want Him to. Why does there have to be pain and suffering in this world? Why would God even allow this stuff?  Once we got off the ferry the conversation continued. Meanwhile I am still on a hunt for a band-aid. Then I got the idea of how to help my kids understand God just a teeny bit more using the lack of a band-aid experience.

I explained that God always provides.I explained that God's timing is always better than our timing or our demands.   I explained that sometimes God gives us glimpses of HIM working in our lives as a faith building moment. Like..."hey I am working this out for you, and here is a bit of proof."  That example is often so tangible you know it came directly from God. I then explained that sometimes God just does not show himself to us unless HE knows we need to be reminded that he is working out things on our behalf. I said that my shoes were causing me a blister. And do you really think that God would just drop a band-aid out of the sky when I already knew I should not wear these shoes. I said that God might do that if he needed to remind us that HE truly is in the middle of our circumstances. Just then the 5 year old looked up. And then all six of us were looking up. And there floating out of the sky was a perfectly  wrapped band-aid. Did you read that? A band-aid blew through the air and landed right in front of me.

We all freaked out. I mean really freaked out. God had a faith building moment that came from the sky. I went over to a bench and sat down to unwrap and adjust this band-aid. I started weeping. Thanking God for having my back. Thanking God for helping me explain to my kids, that even in all this hard stuff, God is caring for us. A band-aid fell out of the sky. A story my kids will never forget. Truly God is the the smallest parts of our lives.

A side note this event is that my fourteen year old attending a summer youth camp the following week.  During cabin time he shared this story. The next morning my oldest son, a youth pastor at this camp, called telling me that Ethan was telling crazy stories during cabin time. I assured him that the story was very much true to how it was shared. God using this story to share with others of HIS faithfulness.

And that is one faith building moment from the sky. Thank you Lord Jesus. And those shoes....well they have been tucked away for good.

Does The Enemy Keep You Quiet?

What exactly is the "enemy". The enemy of fear. The enemy of worry. The enemy of deceit. The enemy of robbing me of sleep. The enemy is that which keeps you from being who God designed. The enemy attempts to hinder you in ALL areas of your life that God wants to step into the middle of. Imagine if we could, in the middle of  facing difficulty, release our thoughts from worry, from fear, and from deceit? What might your story look like?

I decided that I did not want to wait until the end of the story or the end of the journey or the end of this season to share the miraculous ways God has stomped on the enemy. I felt fear. Fear is standing in a court room and hearing a stranger try to prove I was an unfit mother. When I received notice that within 48 hours I was to be in court to represent myself on being a mother. I was full of fear. The enemy of deceit had a strong-hold on my thoughts.  I did not sleep for two days. I opened up my computer and panicked over what I should be googling to defend my honor as a mother. I cried non-stop for most of those 48 hours and sleep. Forget about sleep. I prayed every moment my breath could utter a prayer. I prayed every moment my head cleared. And the enemy of fear, worry, doubt, deceit and rest robbed me blind.

And here begins a story of God stepping in when we release to Him ALL of this. I called my daughter not knowing what to do. I cried my eyeballs raw. I could not eat or sleep. Being a mother for almost 30 years and two people  now wanting to prove me an unfit mother. Lord have mercy on me. Emily suggested I call my church. And I did. I knew the pastor's wife and I left the crying-est message ever. I asked if her she could send someone my number to just simply pray with me. I did not know what to pray. I did not know what I was doing. I was clueless and living with the strongholds of the enemy. My life was not around lawyers, and legal matters. I only had one full day to prepare for this court hearing and according to my daughter there were 32 of her friends praying for me. And I went to my Facebook community and asked them to pray. And then something miraculous happened.

My heart calmed down. My head cleared and if this was a modern day parting of the sea, the waters parted and a way was made. It started with a call to a friend who had worked in family law.  I had not talked with her in months. Her name and face just came to my mind. She instructed me to print anything and everything from text messages, to emails, to receipts to whatever "God puts on your heart." And then the next thing is that my printer that was "out of ink" and went on to print over 150 pages. And then I needed a document. A legal document that I was already told that I could not get access to. The process was 7-10 business days. I cried and decided to get into my car and beg them face to face. I pulled up to the offices. Before getting out of the car my phone rang. A stranger. A stranger from my church called to pray with me. And she prayed over the situation and she prayed that God would make a way for providing the paperwork I would need. And I went to the office and  a woman passing through the office heard my name. And she knew my name. She had been instructed to provide that document for me. And I walked away with the papers in my hand.

My mind was sharp. I researched online every legal word I did not understand. I researched the law and God gave me wisdom I can not explain. God removed the fear, the worry, the unknowns the words of deceit. Because not only did that lady in the office know my name, but God knows my name. And God knows your name. And He knows all your worries, your fears, your hard. AND He is there waiting to help.

I went to bed at 10pm that night. I was prepared and ready for my case. And there was no sleep to be found. I tossed and turned. Finally at 1am I got up and took my shower, did my hair and make-up and drove an hour and a half away to where court would take place. I texted my friend in that town letting her know I was driving straight to her house and may be sleeping on her sofa when she woke up. She was going to court with me that day. I arrived at 5:30am and instead of sleeping I prayed. And then she and I prayed.

And I stood in court and to this day I really have no idea what happened. I know that God gave me wisdom. God gave me the words to speak the truth in HIS name. God stepped right in and took over what the enemy tried to control. And the enemy of fear, worry, and deceit lost in court. And my friend sat in that court room praying. The judge ruled in my favor. I was prepared. I was ready and I have no idea how I even did that except I did nothing but step into what God promises.

How much do we trust God to hand it over to Him? Are we even confident that HE will see us through?   I would like to say that my trust is perfect just by walking close to Him, but guess what. It's a daily release. A daily ongoing conversation I have to have with God.

Are we "approaching" God's throne? I have to believe that this is not just a one time act and we get it. As least not for me. AND God's promise of grace and favor. Hallelejah and Glory-Be. Like I said I can not tell you about that day in court or the many other times that followed but God's grace and favor followed my "approaching" his throne.

Hebrews 4:16

"Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need."

The enemy would like to keep you quiet, alone and captive to his ways. Does the enemy hold you captive and keep you quiet? Do not allow that in your life. Every single day I have to renew my heart's condition and release to God all of the fears and worries. 

If you are in a situation and you know that the enemy is distracting you with fear, with worry and deceit I ask that you stop right now what you are doing and call out to God. He knows you. He knows your story and HE promises grace and mercy. And then call on your friends who can pray for you. Call on strangers to pray for you. God crushes the enemy. God wins. 

Lord have mercy on me!! Thank you for reading, 

PART TWO: Blessings Follow Obedience

Blessings Follow Obedience

I have journal pages filled with  countless blessings in my life.  There was a long time that I felt that I had to be quiet about all these blessings. Embarrassment of the BLESSINGS.  What I soon realized was that more important than the blessing was that painful process, the journey, the surrender and the obedience that came before.  Most don't see that journey and there lies the story of our blessings, of my favor and joy in the blessing of following Jesus.

Our speaker, Amanda Higgins, shared the amazing heaps of blessings in her life.  The struggle before would have been unseen, but she shared that.  Losing a job, needing to work, and God placing her on a two month journey of quietly and painfully growing closer to Him during that time of not working.  She shared how that  painful refining was a gift.  

Do we view that painful refining as a gift?

What is God asking you to do?

Do you shrink back from the pain of refining?

1 Peter 2:19 

"For this is a gracious thing, when, mindful of God, one endures sorrows while suffering unjustly."

How many times have we encountered that unjust suffering?  

Asking God how this could happen and why is it happening.    In those mourning times of unjust is when God is there, every tear, every turn and our response to Him is what He desires.  He is choosing you. It's easier to choose the world, run into the arms of idle chatter, discontentment, and babble on to everyone else, when all God desires is for you/me to come in closer to Him, so he can speak into our hearts what His next move is, His calling in our lives. 

2 Peter 1:10

"Therefore brethren, be all the more diligent to make certain about His calling and choosing you; for as long as you practice these things, you will never stumble."

Wow HIS calling and choosing you and me.

The stumbling  happens when I dip my heart  and thoughts into the world, and then confusion sets in and I have no idea what my calling might be.  How about you?

CALLED TO GO-------------------->DESIGNED TO GO-------------------->TIME TO GO

Our struggles He knows.  The details of our challenges, He knows every single detail.  Are you practicing, developing habits of running to Him?  

Think about Daniel in the old testament.  Where did God place him?  In the courts of the heathen monarchs.  Daniel who loved the one true God with outward passions is used among heathens.YES!!!  Daniel was given a place of prominence and responsibility in Nebuchadnezzar's kingdom.  I have often felt like a modern day Daniel.

I use to feel like a "Christian Misfit".  Yes, a true modern day outcast among my Christian friends. I am quite fond of Daniel and his heart to be used right where God had called him.  I did not understand my own calling in my late 20's.  I worked alongside the world.  Not in a church, not in any form of Christian circles.  I did not volunteer in the nursery or lead Bible study groups.  I said "no" when asked to be on the worship team, and no in other ministries.  It was not where I felt called, and it was not a popular choice.  Sadly I gave myself that title of "Christian Misfit".  When my Christians friends sat around talking about being home full time, and leading Bible groups, I went quiet.  Working moms, were viewed as ungodly.  Working in the world was even more "ungodly" so I shrunk back and just smiled with my "Christian Misfit" smile.

Daniel did not shrink back.  His calling was a testimony to the power of God working in his life among the heathens. Daniel was favored for his obedience to God.

Daniel 1:9

"Now God granted Daniel favor and compassion in the sight of the commander of the officials."

Daniel 2:48

"The the king promoted Daniel and gave him many great gifts and made him ruler over the entire providence."

As I began to understand God's calling on my life, my confidences grew up too.  I had confidence that God had me right where I should be.  Working in my own business that allowed me to have that stay home mom presence to my children.  Working in my own business that had huge financial blessings.  Those blessings used to pour into his Kingdom in ways that were needed to grow ministries.  The enemies lie "Christian Misfit".

"If you character is not ready, God's anointing will not bless." 

Amanda Higgins

What is God trying to work out in you? In your character?  Are you ready? It might hurt.

"Favor is more than we deserve, but we have to be ready to step into it." 

Amanda Higgins

Phil 4:17

"Not that I seek the gift itself, but I seek the profit which increases to your account."

Proverbs 10:22

"It is the blessing of the Lord that makes rich, and He adds no sorrow."

Do you look to another and complain that they walk in God's favor?  

Begin to measure your heart and ask God to open your heart to His calling in your life.  

Are you shrinking back and away when that painful refining begins?

God has to establish our hearts towards Him in order for us to hear from Him.  There are many distractions that the enemy uses to try to keep us busy, and loud and not able to hear from God.

He wants to bless us, and He wants to give us more.  In that favor there is protection.

Psalm 5:12

"For is is You who blesses the righteous man, O Lord.  You surround him with favor as with a shield." 

Obedience requires that we press in very, very, very close to God.  He goes before our thoughts, our actions, our interactions.  He will guide in the smallest of ways.  I said earlier that I have many journal pages filled with the ways in which God has blessed me.  Friends let be clear on one thing.  Many of these journey's have been very painful and very hard.  Unseen, but no more in hiding.  No longer that "Christian Misfit".  No longer embarressed over just how much God has heaped on me, the blessings, the favor and the protection.

I chatted with a lovely young mom a few weeks back. If you are reading you will know who you are.  She shared with me her lovely life.  In almost a whisper she said,

 "I feel like I just need to be quiet with how much 

God is blessing me. 

I get to be a full time stay home mom, I love my husband so much, 

he is so amazing, and well it's kind of embarrassing."

As I listened, I understood clearly her struggle of "embarrassment of blessings" as I too have struggled with the same.  I mean really how do you share with your friends that your tiny little business just grossed over 3 million in one year and much more the next.  How do you share the blessings of being on the cover of Neiman Marcus, and Better Homes and Gardens.  Sounds kind of braggy doesn't it?  Especially when others are struggling so much in their marriages, their relationships, their jobs.  When Amanda Higgins shared the blessing of landing the most fantastic job ever, it was not about her.  It was not about her gifted and amazing skills. It was about her painful journey to surrender and obedience.  

Dear Mom, who shared on the phone, your story of obedience gives credence the favor and blessings God has surrounded you with.

Dear Elizabeth, your favor and blessings in a business were from a heart that said, "God I will share who you are in my life with strangers, and I will share all this blessing to give in ministries that I can not work in, but can write a check for."

Nothing in the blessings of business show the painful journey of meeting furniture trucks at 5am in the pouring rain and unloading 184 pieces of furniture in the dark with a fever of 104 degrees.  Asking and crying out to God why he would have me in this silly business. Nothing in my journey shows the pain of holding countless mother's hands, losing their babies and having to come in to face me and cancel the order for their baby's room.  Did God need Elizabeth to sit with these strangers and reveal to them a God who was bigger and greater.  Crying with them and praying with them in a store.  We can never know or we know it plain as day, why God calls us.

Blessings follow our Obedience!

Find a journal and begin writing.  Thanking God for His favor in your life. Pick up the phone and share your story.  That journey that brought you to a place of favor, that others may see your life.  Like the blind man, who could see.  He went running off and praising God for what God had done in his life.  Open your eyes, and see!

Next in this series: Cultivating Favor 

A quiet time of reflection

For the past few weeks I have spent the better part of the boy's napping time in prayer. Our church is hosting a women's event and I have been asked to share my story. There are many people working hard behind the scenes and I know that my part is not just sharing my story but taking time every day to pray for those who are working behind the scenes and for those women who will be attending.


Each day I have reflected on specific events in my life. I have poured through years of journaling and find myself in tears over and over again. Sometimes the tears are mourning once again that little broken girl, sometimes the tears are complete awe and wonder of how specific God has been in so many areas of my life. I am so glad to have these pages to read, to reflect, and to have the tangible evidence of God in my life. I wrote in my journal in March of 1985. I was a first year college student struggling with the normal things that young girls struggle with. One phrase I wrote "Dear Lord help me to live like You would live in the business of life". I go on to talk about a boy I was dating, my studies, and not making the traveling music group. Realizing that music was my passion and I did not make the group. The director pulled me aside, and said that I have had many opportunities in life. This other person has very little and this will esteem her. I was told that I sing much better than she but she needed this more than I did. In my journal I prayed that God would give me a career in music.

Today, as I reflect I chuckle at the sense of humor God truly has. A career in music I asked. Little did I know that career would be providing the opportunities for young musicians in my own home. Little did my 19 year old heart know that God had bigger and better plans when that was my only plan.

I have not had much time to sit and ponder thoughts to be written, but today impressed on my heart is simply that God has always had a plan in my life for His Glory. I may have swayed from His plan, but always He takes me back into His arms of Love and Care. As I pour through the pages of my life, the reflections of how I have so miserably stumbled I thank God for giving me so much to be grateful for, for the blessings bestowed on my family and on me. Even in hard times we don't have to look to hard to find God's plan and purpose.

I can embrace the past with a true Hope for the future. Blessings.

Sneaking away for a moment

I have not blogged in a while. I have had many thought provoking topics that come to mind, but for now they are collecting dust on the shelves of my brain. I have committed one hour a day to pray for the ladies in my church. That hour falls during my normal computer time which is the afternoon, while little ones sleep.

Right now Emily is chopping onions, the boys are cozyed in to a movie while we anticipate the fun of dinner guests. It's an earlier dinner as this family has children my kids ages, so we are all taking a break.

I have been so moved over my time in the past few days as I have prayed for the Night of Prayer our church is hosting for the ladies of our church. This is going to be a time of not just fellowship, food, chocolate (as the invite reads), but a time of great expectations for the night. I am finding that the hour I have committed to praying every day has turned into much longer. Often interrupted by a child waking up.

Today I was brought to tears and could not stop crying. In praying over the Night of Prayer, and knowing that God would use this time to do mighty works in my own heart I got kind of fearful. I am such a miserable person, if you look at a timeline of the times I have chosen to walk alone instead of with God. It just brings me to my knees to know that God has had such mercy and favor over my heart. I should not have been so blessed, but I am and God sees me worthy to forgive me in so many areas and continue to bless me. Does anyone else feel this way? I have shared before from Jeremiah 29:11, but there is more:

Jeremiah 29:12 & 13
Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart.

So much searching, so much seeking, but not always for Him, and yet when we choose to seek and search with all our Hearts for our Mighty God there He is. It does not matter what our past looks like to Him. These verses give me such confidence in the work I have for His Kingdom. Please will you take time to pray for the event on February 6th. I thought it would be hard to give up an hour in the middle of the day, but now I am looking forward to this time more and more. Blessings, Elizabeth

Blessed Be the Name of the Lord

Last week my son called me and said "Mom our worship team sang this song (Blessed be the Name of the Lord) and prayed for you" . He then called me and said that a number of worship teams in the South are praying for you and in God's way, always His way, wouldn't you know my passion for music and I am being prayed for by young men and woman who are using their gifts of music to bless others.

I went down to the piano and looked through the worship songs my kids have kept from years of being on worship teams. Wouldn't you know it, they were alphabetized so I did not have to look past the B's to find the worship song Blessed Be the Name. I pulled it out and tucked it into my Bible.

Saturday I was at a women's gathering. It was very special in that the woman who spoke has been a mentor for our pastor's wife and our pastor's wife does not keep the wisdom of this 73 year old woman to herself. Well can you guess what one of the passages of scripture she taught from? Yep, Job. And when Job faced the worst possible catastrophes in his life what did he do? He fell on his knees before God and said what? "Blessed be the Name of the Lord".

Job did not alter his faith in the almighty God, even in the face of extreme trials. Nope he could fall before his King, your King, and my King and offer up praise to Him.

Today I sit in wonder of the examples of misfortune in the people I know and the Godly men and women in the Bible. I am comforted by these stories of those who kept their focus on Christ. It did not mean there would be no emotion, no pain, no loss. It did not mean that life was going to be honky-doree. It meant that there is someone who knows me and will give me the comfort that I am going to crave in these next months as they unfold.

The results of my MRI are "dreadful". This is a word used by a friend and I love that word. It just gives meaning to a tumor. Dreadful. This friend has given me the understanding of allowing myself to grieve this news regardless of what the next steps will be. There is a mass behind my optical nerve. It explains why my vision has been deteriorating and explains many other things. We have a mighty God and with that also comes a sense of humor. We cry, we laugh, we cry, we laugh. I told Emily she now has a title for her book she might write someday. "Deaf Brother, Blind Mother'. Please laugh, it's okay. I also took 15 minutes to shower, dry my hair and put on lipstick with my eyes closed and you know what...I did fine. I may not lose my sight, but that can happen so in my own way I tested the waters for 15 minutes.

Please pray for our entire family in way that can only bring Glory to God. I am scared and my mind would like to take me to a white cane with a blue tip or is it a red tip, but I know that I am to take one day at time and live each day breathing the same air that our Lord Jesus breaths. At this moment I am also reminded of the worship song...Give thanks with a grateful heart Give thanks to the Holy one, give thanks for ........and now let the weeks say I am strong, let the poor say I am rich, let the blind say I can see...I am not sure that is the exact words, but it jumped into my mind and out my fingers the words clip along.

If you have a trial in your life put your faith, your focus, and your heart into the hands of our Lord Jesus. And Blessed Be the Name of the Lord.

As the mommy heart grows....

For those of you who have one child and know how your heart swells when you see them enjoying life, growing in thier knowledge of Christ and hearing the words come out from their hearts and into my ears. Does you heart just grow? Now times that by five and I really am a blessed mother.

I was sharing this past week with an amazing mother of four children. Her children are all about 8 years older than mine, so I enjoy asking questions about her mothering to learn, and be affirmed in decisions I am making with my own children. She has children who are both using their gifts in music and ministry and I too have been blessed with children who embrace simular things.

I shared with her how I don't get how people remain victims of the past. If I offend anyone who is reading this, believe me that is not my intent. My intent is to simply ask the question of how you see God's salvation in your life. Does he really save us? I live every single day with the knowledge of his saving grace in my life. How I have never treated my children the way I was brought up is only about God and God alone. I could not have been the kind of mother on my own. I shared with this lovely lady how I started praying the day I found I was pregnant with Elliot that I would know how to hold, touch, and love my child. All the holding, touching and what was called love came out of perversion and abuse for me as a child. An old lady who loved Jesus hugged me one time in church and told me that Jesus loves me. I believed that must be what Jesus's love felt like and I embraced that one hug for many years. And prayed that God would teach me to know how to hug my own, my first child Elliot.

It's scary being a mother and wanting to do our best. Our best can only be found through the teaching's of God's word, and giving up our past to God regardless of what is was. We are no longer bound by what was, but free for what is., a life that seeks to know the heart of Christ and then live it.

Eric has been encouraged to carry his Bible around. Now it's not a preschool kid kind of Bible. It's like mommy's. As a matter of fact it is one of my favorite Bible's, but he wants to "read" it. So there he will sit, on his bed, during quiet time "reading" his Bible. I trust that God is speaking to the heart of my four year old. He shares with me what he is reading and that God is speaking to his heart. A few days ago he announced that "I am going to be a good reader of the word of God, so I can teach people about the Lord". Sixteen years ago another one of my children told me the same things. Not quite those exact words, but that 20 year old is now sharing his life and knowledge of Christ with his world in Florida.

I pray over the hearts of women who have come from hardships, hard aches, and desire to raise children up in Christ. I pray for all of our mommy hearts that we rely on the witness and testimoney of those mothers that God blesses us with to learn and grow from. And most important that we all get how God delivers us from our past and we don't have to be bound by it, or victims. Our past is never an excuse when we have the Lord God as our Lord and Savior.

Thanks to those mommy's around me that bless me, both young and old.

The blessing of God's word

I have two verses today that I want to thank God for. The first one:

Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the thoughts that I have towards you, says the Lord. Thoughts of peace not evil. To give you a future and hope.

The world can have a view of us that can perplex the core of who we are. We ask ourselves how this view can be when the person rarely spends time with us, and then views our world through past experiences when perhaps bad choices were made. And believe me I have made some humdingers. The world would like to hang onto anything that suggests we are less than who we are today. But take joy today in knowing that God knows our thoughts, our hearts, our agenda's, our pursuit of being closer to Him. He is about peace not evil. He is about a future filled with hope as we grow closer to him. His amazing grace gives us that hope and confidence that the old is old and the new is new. Let no one stand in the way of all that God is doing and wants to do in your life.


Joshua 1:9
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.

It is so easy to become dismayed over the world's views. It is so easy to become weak in our spirit, a beaten down so to speak. But God doesn't just make a polite suggestion to us. He states that He clearly commands us to be strong and of good courage. I love how that is written. "Good courage", not bad or sulking courage, but confidence in God kind of courage.

At times I look back into my past and the places I have been. I am reminded every single day of one drunken night which produced the most blessed little boy. A very hard time in my life. A time when many had great reason to whisper and talk. Boy did I give people reasons to talk, and question my entire life of being a Christian. I lacked strength and courage to get me through some very hard times. I was dismayed and all around me were no thoughts of peace, or even a future of hope. Praise God for that time in my life to bring me to my knees before Him, to rise up and take hold of His love and forgiveness in my life. My future and hope are in His Word, and not the words of others, not the views of others.

If you are reading this today and have hurt lurking in your heart, know that it is not of God. Write out these two verses on a post-it, and put your name in there. Move forward in your relationship with Christ. He wants us to look at the future he has for us. One of hope in Him. I know that God has amazing tender thoughts of me his child, learning and growing more each day. Training and teaching. I don't get an "A" on most days, but I know I am above the scale of failure in His eyes ALWAYS and so are you.

Unexpected sharing of God's Amazingness!!

Today I shared how amazing God is to a perfect stranger. Yep, not me, not my style but he asked.

We are in the process of buying a home. For those who have gone through this process it tends to be an emotional roller coaster of sorts, but so far things are just even. My husband and I have gone into this with the understanding that we would not consider a home unless every single family member was happy with the choice. That being said, we also agreed that if things did not work out, it would be completely okay because we know God gives us the desires of our hearts and He may have a different and better plan. Whoopee!!

I was talking with the mortgage guy today. We are doing things a little differently than we had planned. He asked me how things might look for us, and I said "God is so amazing and good and if you don't know Jesus, you will after hearing our story". Okay I said this tongue and cheek. I confess I expected the questions to continue as they do with a mortgage guy. But he surprised me. He said " tell me how that is?"....tell him how what is, is what I am thinking? "He says I would love to hear your story". At no time during my fifteen minutes of giving God complete glory for what he has done in our family did he make any confessions of being a Christian. He just wanted to know more about what it was about our lives that gave credence and credit to God. Whoopee!!!

When I hung up the phone I prayed for this man. I thought if this loan does not produce the numbers my husband and I want it's okay. Today a stranger heard the amazing power of God. The miracles in this last year. He asked me how I define miracles. I told him that in church on Sunday the pastor said it like this..."a miracle is when God steps in and does the impossible" so I adopted that and shared that with him.

A stranger whom I know very little about except the builder of this home referred him. A stranger who is taking all our personal information for evaluation and I got to show him a glimpse of our Savior in a way that was cooler than if I had planned. I just love how God drops someone into our lives to expose Him.

Quiet observations....

Do you ever sit quietly watching your children play? Listening to the creative world that surrounds them and realize just how brilliant, gifted, and talented they are.  As I sit and watch in wonder at each child and and ask what God is going to do in this child's life.

Today I was laying on the floor, looking across the floor, under the table and to the other side where Emerson was playing. It's his favorite spot in the house. He knows right where to go when he needs a break from me or his brothers. He was laying on his tummy just gazing outside and humming along with Raffi in the background. Not a worry or care in the world. I watched him for about ten minutes. During this time the heat came on. He was only a couple of inches from the vent. To watch him explore the vent, the air coming through, and then squish his face down onto the vent trying to look in was truly amazing. Why? Why is such a simple process so amazing to me? Because he is my son, he is aware of his surroundings and is curious to explore and learn. He is just simply brilliant.

I laid there and started to pray over this little fellow. Emerson had no clue I was on the other side of the table watching him. As I was praying I became so overwhelmed with how God views me. Like his child He watches in quiet observation and smiles on my life. He thinks I am amazing and has blessed me with the curiosities to learn and grow. I thought how loved I truly am, and I get that in my life. Pretty much on most days, regardless of my mood I do get that, but for some reason just sitting and watching Emerson and relating that moment to how God must sit and watch I realized that He is just not some proud papa in the sky. He is in every way quietly observing my life, encouraging me along and disciplining me when I need it.

Emerson finally heard me and gave me that one finger wave which is so adorable. So I looked up to heaven and gave God that same wave and thanked him for the reminder of his love and care for me. If you are reading this, take a moment and finger wave that wave of connecting with God and saying ...yep I get it. Emerson does not doubt he is loved and that finger wave is our special thing. Blessings, Elizabeth

Miracle Monday

It is once again time for Miracle Monday hosted by our wonderful friend Beth at this sight. http://beth-amomslife.blogspot.com/ . I know, I need to figure out Mr. Linky, but this is the best I can do in the moment.

God continues to impress upon my heart that each day is full us His glorious wonder. Miracles are around us. Today my heart was heavy with a situationt that had really started last fall. God has moved our family into a greater place of knowing Him and getting that there will be storms to pass through. We passed through a big one last fall. As our hearts have been working on forgiveness and healing in this matter I am continually blessed with little things that remind me that God is watching over my hearts concerning this matter.

An incident came up this past week that brought back some of the emotion of last fall. I know it's not of God, and thus the confusion over our hearts. My husband and I have prayed over this and I have such a sense of knowing He is really caring for my heart. This morning I woke up thinking over things. It's not something I can just pick up the phone and yack away with a friend over. Yet, being the kind of woman who likes to process outward I am feeling a little locked up inside my head. So I just prayed this morning that God would prevent my flesh from speaking ill will about anyone circling this situaiton and that my life would simply continue to walk in His spirit. The wieghts of my heart have lifted and I realized that I would not give the enemy any more room in my brain.

Then the phone rings and it's a women who years earlier walked through a simular storm. I have maybe once spoke with her on the phone, maybe not even once. But she called for a completely unrelated matter, but our hearts connected and the love, care, and encouragement she shared was what I needed. I needed it today, not last fall, not yesterday, but today. I think this is how God works his miracles. He knows the timing of when our hearts are ready to accept His divine interventions. He knows the miracle for the moment and if our hearts are open to receieve He does give and bless us.

I believe this to be one of His many miracles, and this is just something blessed me so much today. How can this not be a miracle. Someone calls me out of the blue just at the moment I am praying over the need to process outward. Thanks God!!!