Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Mom, You Are So Weird
She does not like much attention. This is her birthday month. Leaving the end of being a teenager. She will most likely come out of her room, after having read this and say something like..."mom, you are so weird"...or..."motherrrrrrr, you are so weird". I asked one of her good friends the other day if she calls her mom weird and she said yes, so I have come to learn that it's an endearing kind of phrase.
Feeling a special kind of caring is especially tender when it comes from a child. You know that little squeeze of your hand and a little person saying I love you. She has never been like that. As a matter of fact I have many framed pictures and files of her love for her mommy, and I have never ached to have that random act of a hug and an I love you. It's not so much her. She is a doer of her love, and a writer and both are endearing to me.
In the early morning she was a doer that touched my heart. I think it's days like today when God shows me that I have not totally messed up my kids. She had to go to jury duty. An act of being an adult, and that she is. It was about 40 minutes away and she could have spent two hours on two or three buses to get there, but instead she kindly asked if I might take her, and I said yes. On one condition. That she get her brothers up, in the car and wake me up and hand me the car keys. It's summertime and who wants to get up, dressed, and out the door at the crack of dawn. She agreed.
About 6:30am there was a knock at my bedroom door. There stood my sweet daughter holding me the perfect cup of brewed coffee with just the right amount of milk. I looked at her bleary eyed and said thanks. She said it's time to go and I said "lets get the boys out of bed". She said they were already loaded in the van. Wow, I did not hear a thing. I got into the drivers seat and looked back into the van at three dressed little boys all eating their toasted bagels with peanut butter. I looked at her sweet face and could not say a big enough thanks. She dressed, fed, and got them into the car without so much as a peep.
She told me once that sometimes I don't notice what she has done, and I notice only what she has not done. The day she told me that I started taking notice of the heart of a servant. Not just that teenager who might ploy to get what she wants because she does not ask for much, but truly a heart that serves others. Not just her family, but others too. She's balanced in that she does not compromise her school, or her commitments for overly serving, but even in the smallest ways to stand back and see her heart this early morning I smile. As she is leaving the teenager years with this being her birthday month I shall take some older journal entrees and share more of what my journey as a mother of a daughter has been.
Pie-Sweety, if you read this.....well I am always in acceptance the endearing "oh mother". And truly you blessed my heart. Thanks