Thursday, August 27, 2009

Referencing My Past

If you are a reader of my blog, you will note that when I speak of old hurts I will often reference "my past". I am 43 years old. That is 43 years of a past. Where do you fit into my past? Do read and find familiarity in some of the roads you have walked? Do you get angry over thinking, if you have known me or know of me that this just might be you that I speak of?

I wrote this blog: I wrote it several months ago and received a few comments publicly, but received several emails of how this helped in a situation of healing in another's life. Often I get emails of encouragement and a process of forgiveness and healing in another's life. How can we not talk about our past when God has done so much?

I read recently a post where a woman refers everything to "an old bag" as not to give any hints of who she might be speaking about and the reality is it is most likely not about you, therefore if you see yourself in the "old bag" or "my past" then perhaps God is showing you something that might need to be worked on in your heart.

I am certain that I am the "old bag" somewhere and I take no offense because I want God to challenge me and grow me to be more like Him. Our lives take dramatic turns and twist and sin comes in and destroys relationships. When we can take our "old bag" hat off and examine it and learn from it, we can then share the joy and blessings of how God truly does just step right in.

My past is what it is. I can not change it, and when God swoops into my situation and grows me up more I can share that. When I say "my past" has come back to hurt me, does it mean you, the reader, was part of that story? Does it mean someone who has since passed on? Are you familiar enough with my life that you can make the assumptions and then get angry at me with the assumption of your own hearts?

Why do I post this today? I know there are people who read my blog and get angry with me and have gone to my children stating that I am this or that. Reality is the truth of experience and in my reality of the miserable person I am and can be I can face those realities and only through God's mercy and grace can't help but share to show God is real, His love, grace, and mercy are not just for a select few. If God can come into my life and shines His blessings on me, then He is there for you too.

For those readers who assume that "my past" speaks of them I can only say that perhaps it's not about you and perhaps God is breaking a crack into a wall of healing and forgiveness in your own life.

I have read blogs that I later chose to no longer read. I read this one where there was a huge amount of swear words. The content was actually very brilliant, but when I was done reading the content did not linger, the swear words did. I actually sat one day and counting how many times the "F" word was used and decided this does not edify my heart so I stopped reading. If my blog is not edifying God and growing your passions towards Jesus then please do not read. If you read and see an "old bag" lingering and you think it's you perhaps my can blog be like a moisturizer for that "old bag" skin.

As I sit and chuckle, just a little about "the old bag" I also want to thank so many of you who email me and pour open your hearts, your wounds and are seeking to understand God and His mercy, love and forgiveness. My life is a testament to His healing and growing me up more every day to love, serve and Honor him. I think of 1Timothy 1:15
"It is a trustworthy statement, deserving full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners; among who I am foremost of all"

May your heart and soul be brought into closer proximity as you learn more of who He wants to be in your life. Blessings Dear Friends!!


  1. Great post, Elizabeth. I agree totally. It's a shame that people would read your blog and talk to your kids about it in a negative way, rather then coming to you. Still, it happens often in bloggy land I suppose. I for one really enjoy reading your posts and often do find something that touches my heart on a deep spiritual level. I feel it has been a blessing and I hope you keep writing for many years to come.

  2. I don't know anything about your past. Thank God that most don't know my past. I'm forgiven each and everyday just as you are. It's by grace and mercy that we are saved. I love when you speak from your heart. I find myself learning, growing, and healing when I read your words. I imagine the Holy Spirit speaks through you many times and I am thankful that I found you. Blessings dear one.

  3. Elizabeth, I love you!

    And the funny thing is that... your past... is, well... yours! No one else's. Your perception of your past based upon who you were during that time. No one else could ever know or imagine. Never.

    I love my God who takes "my" past and turns it into healing balm to those lives that I touch.

    "For this reason I say to you, her sins, which are many, have been forgiven, for she loved much; but he who is forgiven little, loves little." Luke 7:47

  4. You are AWESOME, E!!!! I love you!!! Besides- those who look at the past of others- are certainly forgetting the most endearing people writting about in the pages of the Bible- The stories are filled of people with pasts- I love people with pasts- for certainly- they are near and dear to God's heart :O)
    your loving sis with a past!!!

  5. E~ That has happened to me with some blogs too. There was one I just loved but it was so crass I finally had to stop reading it.


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