Accepting The Techy NEW normal.

I have a confession. A few Sundays ago while waiting for church to start I ordered my daughter's birthday presents on-line.  I looked to my right and my daughter-in-love was taking selfies with my youngest. It has been a hard road to accept this new normal in tech at your fingertips.

I realized during this church service that I was using my phone to look up the verses shared, and then to look up deeper meaning in an online commentary. I actually got more out of the message by answering some of the questions rattling around in my head by going to my phone and looking up deeper insights.  It turns out that I am getting better at accepting what has now been around for well over 10 years.

Why has it taken so long for me to NOT be offended that a phone interrupted my time with face to face meetings? I think the detest started with my daughter, who at the time was 16 years old and texting was introduced. She started dating someone and she sat in one spot in the family room for over an hour texting with this young man. I mean how do you have a conversation without actually using your voice-box?. "Oh mom, you need to get with the times." I honestly recall her saying something like that. That was over 12 years ago.

The texting thing led to dinner table rules of "No phones at the table" which led to that wonderful thing of calling your phone service provider and asking that that texting feature be removed from my daughter's phone for three months. I was not about to let my daughter go down this path of disconnecting with human souls. That is what it seemed like to me 12 years ago.

I am an older mom raising young teen boys in the fancy phone culture. None of my boys have their own phones. I am not that popular around here. They do have access to some of my older phones and get phone time. I admit I love that the sports enthusiast can watch games on his phone. And learning to play cribbage with an app. And I love face-timing with my kids, and we do have specific rules which so far comes with some grumbling. I am okay with that,too.

Here is what I do not understand. When parents say they can not get their kids off their phones. It's pretty easy. Take the phone, hide it and insist that rules are to be kept or phones are taken. I had one kid go three months without a phone. It was pretty easy. Argue with me over your phone and you lose a week. Keep arguing and you lose even more time. I have been a little more flexible during vacations and holiday seasons but the bottom line is mom is charge of it all. I have their social media passwords and at any given time mom can take the phones. And the kids have learned to comply with the rules.

It really is not a "new normal" if you are under the age of twenty. This is your only normal, but for us older folks it does take a little getting use to.

And who does not love a good selfie of your kids when the sneak your phone. I love those goofy pictures and can say with confidence we have figured out how to navigate as a family. It has come with some struggles, but overall nothing makes my heart happy than to be tucking kids into bed who are reading books because when all is said and done, the phones are turned off and life still does have the old normal lingering.

I think I will write a post on five ways to stay connected with your kids. As I am happy to say my kids allow me to comment on their social media sights. They are not embarrassed of my sharing and I may be a bit more hip than most when it comes to teenagers and phones.