Thursday, August 6, 2009


Proverbs 15:22
"Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed."

Proverbs 15:2
"The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouth of a fool gushes folly."

Proverbs 15:4
"The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit."

You might ask why I have landed on Psalms 15 today. I ask myself sometimes in my reading for validations in my life. Validations that can only come from God and not of this world. Can God use people for those validations? Of course He can and He does. When it's God's validation there is always peace, not confusion. Not the crushing of one's spirit, not the gushing of folly. As I mentioned in my previous post, last week my spirit was under attach. My spirit crushed and my heart heavy. Praying is soothing to my spirit and soul. I take each days experiences and ask God to show me who to be, what to do, and how to respond to these kinds of things. I receive validation through His Word, and then some who come around and brighten my world. God uses people in my life and I want to be used by Him to come alongside others.

Here then is my question. From whom do we seek council? And if we seek council from a source that another does not agree upon does that mean we have sought out council in a foolish manner?

I have someone very close to my heart. It's my lovely daughter. She will sit down with a plan in her heart. I know she has already prayed over the decision, or the plan. From where my husband and I sit she has extended family. Family that is not necessarily blood related. People that David and I are blessed to know that she will seek out council. Often removing herself from David and from me. There are often plans that might make it difficult for us to be objective so she will seek out those who have lived a lot of life, and every day live out the faith of Christianity. She has many "advisers" and from those whom she trusts she comes away with a common denominator the council is what David and I shared from our own life experiences. It's a blessing to know she is wise in her seeking out the answers to some of life's hardest questions.

This past week has me thinking a lot about decisions and plans and what it feels like when we bring people close into our circle to make some of those decisions. Over eight years ago I was faced with a major decision and went to the one person who I knew from her mothering, from watching her be a Godly wife, and the success she had in her heart. She gave me some very solid council and it was a decision that was not in line with family members. Where does family come in when making sound decisions. When do we trust that they are guiding througgh Biblical principle rather than self serving principles?

I know that when Emily was making a decision to leave an amazing college, and would lose an amazing academic scholarship my self serving heart wanted to council her to stay put in that school. She represented high achievement, success, and in my selfish way some good upbringing for her to have gotten there. My council if self seeking would not have been commended. My council would have been crushing to her spirit, and not wise. I had to take a step back and put aside my selfish goals and dreams for her life.

I like to ask a lot of questions and have always encouraged my children to do the same. One question to ask when reading the Proverbs is simply this...Are my words crushing to one's spirit? Am I gushing folly? I want my tongue to be one of healing, one of that is wise, one that encourages and bring clarity to the heart of another.

Dear Lord Jesus, in the hearts of those you bring into my life, may I seek only Your will, Your plan and reflect on validations and guidance through those whom you have entrusting to the guidance in my own life. You validate my life in You everyday and I am so grateful.


  1. Elizabeth:
    Such a timely and helpful post. I always go to God, usually to my husband and then, perhaps, to my parents. Beyond that, I can't say there are many I trust with my thoughts/plans.

    As my boys have grown older and wiser, I sometimes bring them in on my thinking; still and yet, I long for a few godly women to come alongside and be a mentor to me. I don't have that.

    I could use a "question-asker"! I'd love to sit and have someone ponder alongside me and ask some pertinent questions! Why are you on the other side of the world from me?


  2. Such a wonderful post Elizabeth. I for one know that the best council I can get it either from Wyatt or close friends. Family is just not a place I can go for any help. Thanks so much for posting this. Nice to know others ask questions as much as I do. Take Care.

  3. Your kiddos have an incredible mom! That you can step to the side and let them experience true wisdom. What a gift! Hope I can do the same one day!

  4. Elizabeth, I really love the way you think and write our your thoughts. So wise and encouraging. Thank you for sharing this. An excellent reminder to use our tongues for encouragement and not for folly. Very good.

  5. "you validate my life in you Everyday"

    beautiful. touched my soul. wow.

  6. I think anyone who has children has at one time or another thought of counseling them from a self seeking perspective, but like you said it's good to sometime not gush folly and try to let them seek out the advice that is best for them. Very hard though.

    Proverbs can always be relied upon to speak to the heart.


I would love to hear your thoughts on this post, so please take a moment to comment.