Thursday, May 28, 2015
Single Mommy Badger of Honor
I looked in the mirror this morning and studied my face. I thought of the countless times I cried this year. And then the MORE times I have laughed. I thought of Emerson, with me having the slightest sniffle, asking me if I am crying again. Because sometimes I laugh so hard I am crying. I think of the boys settling on cereal for dinner after I have worked all day. I think of my messy house, because I have yet to find a house keeper who wants to drive 30 minutes to the middle of farmland. Here is a newsflash....there is toothpaste in my sink, piles of laundry and I have not mopped my floors once. Looking in the mirror I just smiled. I did not look haggard, bitter or old. I just looked like a healthy mom, kissed by the sun, and exactly as I wish to look, happy and content.
It is not my mother's heart to have my boys coming from a home divided, but they adapt and you know what they have their own set of struggles and will one day tell their stories. The biggest gift God has given us this season is a 1910 farm house nestled about 30 minutes out of town. It's dated and old and does not offer the kinds of home comforts I have grown up with. What it has given me is precious time with my boys. We do lots of driving. Emerson and I can sing over and over the songs on our 2015 Grammys CD. Whatever boy who sits in the front gets a front row to deer, turkey's, owls, horses, pheasant, quail, badgers and cows. We spend all that time talking and connecting. The best conversations have come on these road trips. God knew we would need that time disconnected. Really disconnected as there is little cell service in these parts.
No matter how much you love God, serve and live by the principles laid out in God's Word there is pain in this world. Choosing to embrace it, live it, and share it is a process of growth, good health and release. It took an adjustment time for all of us. It took making major decisions on my part. Sometimes not making very good ones. I forgive myself, and as each day passes, there is a hope and JOY. Always joy in those harder times. Maybe God just designed me as a happy and joyful person. Or perhaps it is HIM in my life that makes this journey so much more joyful.
Today, that silly "Single Mommy Badger of Honor" is also for you. If you are a single mommy, just know that having a sense of humor will get you through to the other side. Cheers, love and JOY~~Elizabeth